Last week we looked at some of the reasons why people develop low self-esteem. Let’s look this week at how we can increase self-esteem and be a more positive, optimistic person with self-beliefs that support and empower you. Here are some easy things to do that I use with my coaching clients and teach to people who want to become a coach.
One of the reasons people develop low self-esteem is that they get put down for not being good at something. Well, do something you enjoy. When you enjoy doing something, it is not so much a task and easier to accomplish. What do you enjoy doing? As long as it is moral, there is no restriction to this. It could be a hobby, exercise, sport or at work. You could even learn to do something new or that you have always wanted to do. It doesn’t matter as long as you enjoy it and it leaves you feeling great.
Remember that if it is exercise, then chunk the goal into small victories and not on wanting to lose 200 pounds straight away. Often people think they should get to their ideal size overnight, forgetting they did not get to their current size overnight. The added benefit is that exercise also releases endorphin’s, which help you to feel great.
More ways to increase self-esteem
Be around people who make you feel good. If there are specific people who get you down or who contribute to your low self-esteem, then stop being around them. Tell them how they make you feel and ask them to stop doing the things they are doing. If not, spend your time with people who like you as you are, encourage you and who will support you in your efforts. Be mindful of your own actions as well towards others. Do you encourage others or do act like the people you do not want to be around? Don’t complain about things. Rather look for ways to encourage others and find your own encouragement grow, which in turn will increase self-esteem.
Learn to value yourself. What do you give yourself credit for and what do you think you are good at? Being a great friend, partner, helping the less fortunate or anything that you can say, “You know what, I am valuable.” If you are battling with low self-esteem because you are struggling with a particular thing, then ask for help. When you don’t ask, you don’t give somebody the opportunity to say yes. They may not realize you are struggling or don’t want to offend you by offering help. Simply ask and you may be amazed at how willing people are to help. It also makes them feel good to be able to help you.
Sleep is often overlooked as a reason why people feel down. How much sleep are you getting? When do you sleep? Often people think they only need 4 hours per night sleep, which is a mistake. Your body needs the 6-8 hours of sleep a night. This helps to keep you refreshed and energetic. Of course it is also important to add that we also should look after our diet, as diet also plays a role in keeping up energy levels. You have heard the saying, “You are what you eat.” If all we do is eat junk food, then we are not giving our body the right nutrients to keep a healthy body and mind. This also goes hand in hand with alcohol. Now I am not saying don’t drink. In fact, I like a glass of wine or two every now and then myself. The point is to be responsible. I know of people who have a low self-esteem simply because the way they act when they have had a few drinks too many. Not their usual wonderful self, but rather aggressive, demeaning to others or simply not being “nice” to be around. Thus other people don’t want to hang out with them and that fuels the low self-esteem. So consider how you fuel and recharge your body with food, drink and sleep.
What do you say to yourself?
What do you believe about yourself? Instead of thinking of all the things you can’t do, focus on what you are good at. Remember that you were not born with being great at anything. You learnt to be good at the things you are good at and as such you can learn to be great at the things you may have struggled with up till now. Compliment yourself on the things you do well and celebrate the small wins along the way to achieving your goals. Be an inspiration to others as you strive for succeeding at your challenges and give yourself that little silent cheer when you achieve success. This will massively build and help increase self-esteem.
Listen out for the way you speak to yourself. Do you put yourself down? Consciously change the little voice in your head to one that encourages you. If it persists in saying negative things, then change the voice so it sounds like Mickey Mouse or Donald Duck. Make that voice sound so ridiculous that it has no effect on you. Remember that we are all human and can make mistakes. Just like you see differently through 3D glasses, normal glasses and sun glasses, so our view can be different when we look at our self through different eyes. Look at yourself through the eyes of a winner, achiever, can do attitude and you will become those things. Look at yourself through the eyes of one who is a failure and you will see failure.
There are more ways in how you can increase self-esteem, but follow these few simple ideas and notice the change you make already. You owe it to yourself to be the best you can be. Keep a positive mind set and become the person you want to be.
For help with self-esteem simply contact us for more information on how we can help.